We had the good fortune of connecting with Paula Kettula and we’ve shared our conversation below.
Hi Paula, maybe we can start at the very start – the idea – how did you come up with the idea for your business?
People always ask me why did I choose became a social worker and a healing professional. The answer is simple – “I didn’t – it chose me!”
My mother and my beloved grandmother who has already passed away, used to tell me how at age 5 years old, I would organize the neighborhood kids to play games, how I would coordinate and support everyone making sure no-one is excluded.
I also remember a running competition on 1st grade where I was about to win easily by a huge margin but I stopped right before the finish line to wait for my best friend who was second so we could cross the finish line together. And we did! Having compassion, empathy and believing that we all get to be winners was apparently hard-wired within me.
When my parents divorced when I was 8 years old, I experienced a deep sense of rejection and abandonment by my father whom completely disconnected from me. He died of cancer when I was 17 years old leaving me to battle with all the unresolved issues and feeling like I did not matter and that I was not important.
As I grew up I decided no child should ever feel this way which is why I sought to understand human behavior and the psyche.
The trauma from my parents divorce and other difficult childhood experiences became a gift that I have now been passing on to others for years. It nudged me in the right path of becoming a trauma specialist so I can help people find meaning in their pain and suffering and transform their traumatic experiences from anger, fear, and victimhood into gratitude, empowerment and peace.
This calling is bigger than me, it is above me and I am in service to it and to humanity. I am just here on earth fulfilling my dharma (destiny) to the best I can.
What should our readers know about your business?
Currently I am dedicated to transforming overwhelmed, stressed out and triggered parents who keep repeating patterns that do not work into inspiring, empowering, and influential leaders in their family so that they can create deep and meaningful relationships with their children and meet their kids developmental needs with ease and joy versus being exhausted by power struggles.
As I delved deeper and deeper into the world of leadership, I realized the reason why so many parents struggle with their kids, are chronically frustrated by their life circumstances and unsatisfied as parents, is because they do not have the leadership skills to live a vision driven life and know how to be committed to creating the life they want.
To bridge this gap in parenting, I developed a unique approach to parenting called Transformational Parenting which is based on my 20 years of experience working with children and families in the field of mental health as well as my specialized training in transformational leadership.
My BIG vision is to shift the current fear based parenting paradigm into a new parenting blueprint in which parents heal their own wounds so that they can show up for their children as unconditionally loving, compassionate and empowering. A blueprint where parents are able to be their own authentic selves while supporting their children in becoming who they are meant to be versus trying to mold them into who they think they should be…
Parents get to realize that by becoming conscious and aware themselves and by changing the way they parent, they cause the generations down the line to be more altruistic, compassionate and ultimately raise children who become peaceful citizens of this world.
This vision is so big it literally makes me sick to my stomach AND it bring tears to my eyes as think about it. In the process of causing this vision to happen, I get to constantly re-design myself, take risks that I thought I would never take, and truly make the impossible possible.
My plate, my ways of being, and my capacity is constantly evolving and growing. It is a really scary and exciting process all at the same time!
I am leaving my secure therapy work behind and stepping into the unknown world of coaching and developing online programs and courses around my Transformational Parenting Framework.
What keeps me going every day is realizing the prices of doing nothing which are continued hatred, violence, jealously, anger, and competition. If nothing is done, the humanity continues to experience this world as “dog-eat-dog” survival mode versus living a life of possibility, cooperation, unconditional love and creating win-wins across all areas of life.
What also inspires me is seeing the incredible results of parens who have graduated from my 6-month Transformational Parenting Program or taken my one-on-one coaching. Witnessing the transformation of these parents and the shifts it causes in their children is truly priceless and life changing as they are finally able to come from a place of open heartedness, authenticity and vulnerability which translates into the child trusting the parents, feeling safe and loved. These parents are giving themselves a gift of enjoying being a parent and they give their children a gift of becoming a thriving and resilient adults.
Let’s say your best friend was visiting the area and you wanted to show them the best time ever. Where would you take them? Give us a little itinerary – say it was a week long trip, where would you eat, drink, visit, hang out, etc.
San Diego has so much to offer. Even after living here for 22 years, I keep discovering and re-discovering places! My personal favorite that all my friends and family will also get to visit is Mission Bay and Pacific Beach. The beauty and grounding energy of the Mission Bay never gets old and the boardwalk along Pacific and Mission Beaches is always fun and adventurous. The little cafe right on the board walk that is now called Woody’s Breakfast and Burgers never gets old. I have been going there for over 20 years and seen its many faces and owners. It is a classic PB establishment that keeps on giving.
My other favorite place is Little Italy. My heart is constantly torn between Europe where I am from and the U.S. so going to Little Italy gives me that extra little European flare. I used to live in Italy for several months as I was studying the Montessori Method in Perugia Italy. I absolutely fell in love with the country, its people, lifestyle and food. Going to Little Italy gives me a piece of Italy especially if you pop into Papalecco’s to get their cappuccino which in my opinion, hands down, is the best and most authentic cappuccino in town!
My list of favorite spots would not be complete without mentioning La Jolla with its majestic views of the Pacific Coastline and easy going atmosphere. The Living Room Cafe in La Jolla is a fantastic spot to get good food, coffee or wine while chatting with friends or getting some work or studying done which is what I often do.
The Shoutout series is all about recognizing that our success and where we are in life is at least somewhat thanks to the efforts, support, mentorship, love and encouragement of others. So is there someone that you want to dedicate your shoutout to?
Just like it says in the Footprints in the Sand Poem, in the hardest times and in the lowest moments in our lives, we are carried by the love of others and their dedication to our happiness and success.
I have have been very fortunate to have a mother who is unconditionally loving, always encouraging and never judging or complaining even when it meant that she would suffer such as me moving to the United States from Finland 23 years ago. Her trust and believe in me gave me wings every time I doubted myself and felt like I was at a dead end. I got to borrow her belief in me which always gave me the freedom to ultimately just be me and do what my heart called me to do. This is what my shoutout goes to my mom who gives me the strength and resilience to keep moving forward no matter what!
Website: www.transformationalparent.com
Instagram: @transformational_parent
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/transformationalparent
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/transformationalparent
Other: paula@transformationalparent.com
Image Credits
Catherine Housseau & Ricardo Santiago