We had the good fortune of connecting with Carolyn Shadle and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Carolyn, as a parent, what do you feel is the most meaningful thing you’ve done for your children?
The Parent Effective Training course by Dr. Thomas Gordon that I took when my first-born was young gave me skills and confidence in communicating with my two daughters – and everyone with whom I came in contact. It also was the inspiration for a life-long career commitment to writing about and training others in communication skills. I think I avoided a lot of child-rearing battles and eventually saw both of my daughters mature to be productive members of society. Two stories illustrated to me that the girls had learned communication skills from me. The first was when my daughter, newly appointed as a TA (teaching assistant) called and asked me to send her my copy of Teacher Effectiveness Training, also by Dr. Thomas Gordon.. I had not realized that she had paid attention to what I was learning! The second is a comment one of my daughter’s colleagues made to me when I was visiting. It seems that there had been a lot of discussions around diversity and inclusion and my daughter had been instrumental in facilitating some difficult conversations. When I ran into her colleague, she said to me, “You know, your daughter is an excellent listener and communicator. Without her, we would have had some stormy meetings. Her skills enabled us to have some productive discussions.” I was pleased to know that she had learned the kind of communication skills that I was teaching and, I guess, that I had taught at home, too, though less formally!

What should our readers know about your business?
After taking the course created by Dr. Gordon and earning a PhD in Organizational and Interpersonal Communication, I began offering various courses and workshops to help parents, teachers, managers, employees in public and private organizations. As a follow-up to my courses, I created a newsletter, which ultimately was subscribed by people all over the English-speaking world. I stumbled into this and realized that I needed to learn how to use a computer and subscription software and had to hire people to help me, .when the numbers became too great for my children to manage in our living room! Through the newsletter, I was invited to present workshops as far away at Australia and New Zealand. I enjoyed that and wanted to do more. By watching a colleague who traveled with her workshops, I learned that the way to get more invitations was to reach out to subscribers and let them know that I would (or could) be in their region – and then wait for an invitation. Today, my business is unique in that I now spend most of my time focusing my training on professionals in the veterinary and pet-care business. That was an accident (but I know that the answer is taking advantage of opportunities when they come). It happened that a woman that I worked with knew of my interest (and expertise, if I do say so) in communication training, and she asked me to develop communication cases for the monthly magazine of the American Animal Hospital Association. She explained that veterinarians spend their college and medical school years studying science and medicine and don’t have time to explore the social sciences, let alone communication. Their love of animals brought them into this field, but, when they enter the workforce, they realize that the pet-owner is their client, and they need effective communication skills when dealing with pet-owners. Time is limited in the veterinary clinic, just as it is in any healthcare facility, so they need skills that will enable them to impart a great deal of information in a short amount of time. Many pet-owners come to the veterinarian highly concerned about their sick pets, or they are frightened and angry when facing the cost of the animal’s case. Veterinarians quickly become aware of the need to listen empathetically, a skill they may not have learned in med school. I was able to help these professionals. Those magazine cases led to a textbook that the AAHA published, and that led to invitations to train in local clinics as well as at regional and national conventions – all across the country, as well as in Lima, Peru. Along the way, I have continued to explore ways to make my training realistic and dynamic, incorporating video clips and examples that veterinarians have shared. I’ve also endeavored to learn about the pet-care field by completing the Human-Animal Bond Certificate program, a certificate program in Workplace Wellness, and one called The Fear Free Pet Professional. While most of my time for the last 15 years has been devoted to training and writing for the veterinary profession, the skills that I teach are transferable (and were taught in a multitude of venues prior to my work with veterinarians). Going forward, I’d love to get back into training in a variety of settings – for parents, educators, non-profits, agencies, corporations and small businesses. We ALL communicate!

Any great local spots you’d like to shoutout?
Assuming I had a week to serve as hostess to my visiting friend, I’d start in La Jolla, where I live. I’d take my friend to the Children’s Pool to see the seals (and their pups), and I’d tell her the dramatic story about the controversy between those who welcome the seals and those who want to return the beach to children and families only.

I’d then walk to the Cove and let my friend know about this iconic place from which ambitious swimmers set out, around the kayaks, to cross the to the farther coast.

On the second day, we would enjoy a walk around the village of La Jolla, with a stop for lunch at the Girard Gourmet. We’d enjoy delicious and healthy food prepared by the Belgian baker, Francois Goedhuys. Francois owns a small farm in Julian where he grows much of the food (and returns the leftovers as compost). While we’re there Francois’ wife, Diana, will introduce us to interesting people in the community who frequent the cafe. And we won’t leave without one of Francois’ unique cookies designed to celebrate the season or an event. It might be a starfish to La Jolla or it might be a daffodil to tell us it’s spring.

On the third day, if my friend likes controversy, we’d visit another sight with an interesting history: the cross at Mt. Soledad. It’s instructive to recall our nation’s principle of the separation of church and state and to know how the debate played out for many years as those advocating a religious monument even on public land clashed with those who sought legal action to prevent this. After many years of litigation, a foundation was formed to buy the land on which the cross was erected and make it private.

Speaking of history, we would have time in the afternoon to drive to the nearby Salk Institute for Biological Studies and recall the amazing contribution made by Jonas Salk, the developer of the polio vaccine. It’s also worth taking a tour of the Salk Institute to see the Chihuly glass chandelier and the unique campus architecture, designed by Louis Kahn, overlooking the ocean.

By now, my friend can’t get enough of the ocean, so on day four we’ll go to the nearby gliderport and watch the skilled (and brave) flyers take off from the cliff in their beautifully colored kites. I’ll want my friend to know that there is an interesting history here, too. After all, this Torrey Pines Gliderport is the most historic aviation site in North America. Since the 1920’s sailplanes have been launched from these bluffs and many aviation pioneers made their first flights at this location. In fact, on February 24, 1930, Charles Lindbergh had his maiden flight along these cliffs, soaring from Mt. Soledad to Del Mar and establishing the first gliding distance record.

On day five, we’ll spend the day in the Birch Aquarium – with a break for lunch at the cafe. I want my friend to enjoy the outstanding display of seadragons and seahorses. Of particular interest – and amusement – is the wonderful video that shows how the seahorse dad’s give birth to the teeny tiny seahorses. A little more serious is the important exhibit the Aquarium has on the climate crisis – always up to date with the latest alarming statistics and images. The shop is a great place to pick up souvenirs of the visit to La Jolla. Along the way, I’ll be sure to tell my friend that the aquarium is the public outreach center for Scripps Institute of Oceanography at the University of California, San Diego – an important source of research related to the climate crisis.

Speaking of the University of California, San Diego, we must take time to visit the campus. It’s a huge campus, created out of nothing in 1960. Since then is has become a world-renowned research institution serving over 38,000 students, and occupying 2100 acres. I’ll explain how the students are organized into colleges, and we’ll head for the library. I want to go there because I know that my friend will appreciate the statue of Theodor Geisel, better known as Dr. Seuss. It’s fun to know that he lived and worked right here!

We’ve only got two days left, and we haven’t even ventured into the rest of San Diego. Because my friend loves the water, we will take one day to visit the embacadero and nearby Seaport Village. There are so many places to eat at Seaport Village, where we can relax after visiting all of the wonderful shops and vendors.

The relaxing lunch will be just right to give us the energy to walk back to the embacadero and board a boat to Coronado Island. Once on the island, we will take a taxi to the well-known Hotel del Coronado (known as The Del), a wonderful example of Victorian architecture. There’s a lot of history here, too. Opened in 1888, it’s the second-largest wooden structure in the U.S. It’s been featured in at least 12 films, including “Some Like It Hot” (1959, starring Marilyn Monroe). We will stop in the gift shop where there is a video of that infamous movie, as well as lots of memorability about Marilyn and Southern California. We’ll end our day with a delicious dinner overlooking the beach.

There’s only one day left, but a visit to San Diego would not be complete without stepping into Balboa Park, a cultural oasis with 17 museums, beautiful gardens and the world-famous San Diego Zoo. This lovely space blossomed when it was used in 1915 to celebrate the Panama-California Exposition, and it’s continuing to explode with color, performances, and exhibits. A day here, with a stop for lunch at El Praco, is only a taster. One can devote an entire day to each of the 17 museums – and another day or two at the zoo. But I hope my friend will return!

The Shoutout series is all about recognizing that our success and where we are in life is at least somewhat thanks to the efforts, support, mentorship, love and encouragement of others. So is there someone that you want to dedicate your shoutout to?
As I mentioned above, the training course designed by Dr. Thomas Gordon changed my life. Of course, I want to dedicate my shoutout to him.
Let me tell you a little more about him and how my relocating to La Jolla enabled me to complete the circle from becoming acquainted with Dr. Gordon in Buffalo, NY and later visiting his institute.

After using materials designed by Dr. Gordon, learned that Tom Gordon had been a student of Dr. Carl Rogers, the esteemed psychologist who introduced the concept of “Active Listening.” Dr. Gordon believed that the skills that Dr. Rogers practiced as a professional psychologist were skills that every parent (and every human being) could learn and use. So, he set about developing a series of courses and books – for parents, women, business leaders. I was so inspired by the power of his communication framework that I read everything I could find about parenting and then enrolled in a PhD program to immerse myself in the research behind the skills. Meanwhile, Dr. Gordon founded the Gordon Training Institute in Solana Beach, CA.

Over the years, I developed my own courses, created an educational game entitled Building Communication Skills (which The Gordon Training Institute listed in its catalog). Then, mMany years after that first course in Buffalo, NY, I moved to La Jolla and discovered that I was close to Solana Beach., I made the short trip to the institute and met with Linda Adams, the wife of now-deceased Tom Gordon. I had to tell her personally what an impact he had on my life and work. She was a great listener – just as Dr. Gordon had taught us. I’d come full circle from Dr. Gordon’s course in Buffalo, NY to his institute in Solana Beach, CA!

The most important thing I learned along the way is that communication skills are LEARNABLE! My passion now is to teach effective communication skills to individuals, organizations and businesses.

Website: www.ICSinc.info and www.VeterinarianCommunication.com
Instagram: cshadle1
Linkedin: Linkedin.com/in/CarolynShadle
Twitter: https://twitter.com/veterinary_comm
Facebook: www.facebook.com/ICSVetCommunication
Youtube: www.youtube.com/cshadle1