We had the good fortune of connecting with Patricia Love and we’ve shared our conversation below.
Hi Patricia, what makes you happy? Why?
Inner Peace…When I can sit with myself every night, knowing that during the day, I did the very best I could…I find inner peace. and that makes me VERY Happy.
Alright, so let’s move onto what keeps you busy professionally?
I did a 360 in my business, due to hitting rock bottom, I have included my story which will answer a lot of those challenges and questions.
I’ll never forget the day I hit rock bottom. I remember being curled up on the floor in my home, completely broken, and wondering what to do with my life. It was 2009 and the Global Financial Crisis was really starting to bite.
I had been a successful Realtor for many years but suddenly I found myself with no money in the bank, no income and a terrifying $140,000 in debt.
My Mom had recently passed away and my husband had left me for somebody else.
I was 57 years old, devastated, overweight and lost. What was I supposed to do now?
Everything I’d worked so hard for and sacrificed so much for, had slipped away.
In truth, ‘slipped away’ is an understatement. I felt as if my life had been swamped by a tsunami and everything I understood about myself, and about my life, had been carried away in a heartbeat. I’ll admit, I wallowed for a while. I felt like a victim.
And I knew what it was to be a victim because in my twenties, I had twice been the victim of rape Once by a stranger with a gun and once by a boyfriend who beat me up and put me in the hospital.
So, when everything fell apart for me in my mid 50’s, I felt again the wave of despair, helplessness and powerlessness that I’d felt all those years before. It all came rushing back with a power that took my breath away. But I also remembered that feeling like a victim, and living like a victim, hadn’t worked for me in my twenties and it sure as hell wasn’t going to work for me in my fifties.
Let’s face it, at 57, I had less time in front of me, than was behind me. I couldn’t afford to wait until things ‘got better.’ I had to act right then and there before my future ran out on me.
So …I picked myself up off that floor and took a long hard look in the mirror.
It was time to get real …
I had worked hard to be successful, to be valued, loved and appreciated. I’d given my all to improve the lives of the people around me. But I’d been like the proverbial beautiful swan, serene and unruffled on the surface…And paddling madly and desperately underneath.
The harder I tried to make everything perfect … the quicker it slipped through my fingers … until it became that tsunami that swept everything away and I was left with nothing.
Being the top saleswoman in my company didn’t keep me from falling into debt
Making a ton of money didn’t keep my husband by my side
Wearing beautiful clothes didn’t make me feel beautiful
Working hard to make others happy, didn’t bring me the happiness I wanted
Being successful in business didn’t make me feel successful in life
Smiling on the outside didn’t make me smile on the inside …
It was all a sham. A mask I had put on years before and had forgotten how to take off. A mask I couldn’t afford for anyone to see behind, But when everything was stripped away … there was only me, myself and I.
And that I was enough. I had to be enough!
12 years on, I look back at that tsunami with gratitude, with appreciation and with wonder.
The fever pitch of emotion and the extreme pressure of that time created the perfect conditions to break me open and reveal the real me within.
I’m still a successful realtor, and added coaching and author to my resume.
I still inspire people to be happy.
I still wear beautiful clothes.
I still smile.
But everything is different …
I’m no longer that swan paddling desperately beneath the surface to stay upright.
Now I glide through life with a feeling of ease.
I DISCOVERED ME! … I stepped off the hamster wheel that I was running on for so long, I acknowledged my mistakes and replaced them with more positive behaviors, which allowed me to release the worry that people would see through the mask. This resulted in me feeling, that I didn’t need to prove myself to anyone!
I worked hard to discover me, but it was worth it, as now I can look in the mirror and see myself in all my brilliance, I learned to love me, and all my imperfectness.
I now make my mess, my message…Today I am a motivational and confidence coach, Neurolinguistics practitioner, (NLP) Emotional Freedom Technician, (EFT) and the author of the #1 Best Seller “Seen and (Un)Heard.” I spend my time coaching women to acknowledge their own inner power, and that change is possible at any age. I live in daily gratitude.
Patricia Love, Best Selling Author
Patricialove.com
Confidence and Motivational Coach for Women
CPC, NLP, EFT
If you had a friend visiting you, what are some of the local spots you’d want to take them around to?
I would start in old town and enjoy drinks an guacamole at Que Sazon, then I would head to Mission valley for a little shopping, then hit the beaches, starting with mission beach my old haunt, walk the board walk…and people watch. We would head to La Jolla for some beautiful views then enjoy a fabulous dinner at the famous Marine Room. San Diego is a beautiful place just to roam, enjoy the sun and the people. Before they left I would make sure we enjoyed appetizers at Mr. A’s in Downtown San Diego. It would definitely be a beach foodie tour!
The Shoutout series is all about recognizing that our success and where we are in life is at least somewhat thanks to the efforts, support, mentorship, love and encouragement of others. So is there someone that you want to dedicate your shoutout to?
My Sister Ginger Love, who is no longer with us, but her support, and love lead me to where I am today. She taught me to be strong and independent, but to never give up on myself. If it weren’t for her influence, I could be writing a very different story today.
Website: PatriciaLove.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/coachpatricialove/
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lovepatricia/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheRahRahCoach/
Image Credits
Patricia Love