We had the good fortune of connecting with Vivian Meraki and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Vivian, career-wise, where do you want to be in the end?
I don’t see an end to my career, this is my life’s work. My end goal isn’t a title or a position, it’s legacy. The vision I’m building is a world where emotional safety and nervous system awareness are the norm, not the exception.

Much of my work is with people in the most difficult moments of their lives: divorce, grief, and profound loss. These are the times when it feels like everything is falling apart, when you are losing hold of who you want to be, and when it’s hardest to stay steady. In those moments, it can be especially disorienting and difficult to stay aware of the what you’re feeling within you and to notice how you are responding to the stress and loss.

For parents, these moments are especially crucial, because children are always watching. They’re mirroring our nervous systems, our behaviors, and our survival patterns… and even developing new ones of their own just to get by. That’s why awareness matters so much, because what we pass on in those moments becomes part of their story too.

The legacy I care about is in those imprints: what our children inherit, the cultures we create in our companies, and the way our presence shapes even the people we may never realize we’ve touched. If my work helps more families and leaders choose presence and connection over control and perfection, then I’ll know I’ve done what I came here to do.

Alright, so for those in our community who might not be familiar with your business, can you tell us more?
My business is called Unshakable Parenting, and I work with parents going through some of the most difficult transitions of their lives: burnout, grief, loss, and divorce.

What sets my work apart is that I don’t approach these challenges only from the mind. I approach them somatically through the nervous system and the body. Because when your nervous system is in survival mode, you can’t access your best parenting tools, your clearest communication, or your deepest intuition.

What I teach parents is how to be present to themselves so they can co-regulate with their children. Presence over perfection. Connection over control.

What I’m most proud of, and what excites me most, is witnessing the transformation my clients go through. It’s not just a shift in how they feel within themselves. It’s a shift in the relationships around them. Because when they change, so do the people around them. One client said to me, “You didn’t just change my life, you changed the lives of my children, and their children, for generations to come.” That’s the kind of work this is.

I think of one parent who came to me deeply worried about their connection with their child, and how dysregulated they felt especially during high-conflict moments with their co-parent. After just one session together, things began to shift. That week, when a conflict arose, they stayed calm and grounded. Their co-parent initially thought they had shut down, but instead, they were fully present. They responded, “I’m here. I’m listening. I’m just present with you.”

That moment created something new: the realization that they could create safety and groundedness for themselves, no matter what was happening around them. And for the first time in a long time, they were able to calmly share a few meals together as co-parents with their young child. And that child got to spend time with their parent they otherwise wouldn’t have been able to see and start building towards what many children in conflict situations rarely get to feel: safety.

That’s the power of this work. It’s not about avoiding hard moments. It’s about moving through them differently with awareness, regulation, and choice. And when parents choose presence and trust, they don’t just change the moment. They change the legacy.

Any places to eat or things to do that you can share with our readers? If they have a friend visiting town, what are some spots they could take them to?
If my best friend came to visit, I’d want the week to feel nourishing for the soul and senses. We’d start slow mornings at my favorite coffee spots with a golden turmeric latte from Mayil Coffee or the rich, dreamy atmosphere at Liu Lokum Atelier, a Turkish café that is a gem of a café.

We’d spend time in nature: walking the lakefront, exploring High Park or Trinity Bellwoods, where you might stumble upon a drumming circle or someone tightrope walking under the trees.

There’d be food, of course. Probably a priority of mine as I love to eat! Delicious ramen, hidden taco spots, hot pot and dim sum that lasts for hours. We’d wander Kensington or St. Lawrence Market, and whatever street market happened to pop up that weekend.

And if we wanted a little magic? Allan Gardens Conservatory. Lush, quiet, otherworldly. The kind of place that makes you believe in fairies.

The Shoutout series is all about recognizing that our success and where we are in life is at least somewhat thanks to the efforts, support, mentorship, love and encouragement of others. So is there someone that you want to dedicate your shoutout to?
When I think about the people and influences that shaped me, there’s one book that stands out as a turning point in my life: The Grief Recovery Handbook by John W. James and Russell Friedman.

I lost my father when I was 28. He was my rock, and losing him felt like losing the air I breathed. I didn’t know which way was up. I didn’t know how I would get through the days, I couldn’t imagine how to get through a single day, let alone carry on with life. Grief felt like molasses: heavy, slow, impossible to move through. That book became a lifeline. It offered not just comfort, but a practical methodology for organizing my thoughts and feelings, validating my experience, and giving me a way to move forward… not forward to, but forward towards life again.

Decades later, when I wrote my own book, Parenting Through Divorce, it was surreal to see it sitting on the same virtual shelf next to The Grief Recovery Handbook. My book grew out of the same desire: to be a lifeline in dark times, especially for parents going through divorce. I wanted to offer not just hope, but concrete practices, conversations, and somatic tools to help parents support their children without losing themselves in the process.

One of the greatest honours has been hearing readers describe my book the same way I once described The Grief Recovery Handbook, as a warm hug and a lifeline through some of the hardest days. For me, that’s a full-circle moment. That’s legacy.

So if John and Russell are reading this, you supported me through one of the darkest times in my life. Thank you.

Website: https://www.vivianmeraki.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/vivianmeraki

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/vivianmeraki

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@vivianmeraki

Other: TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@vivianmeraki/

Image Credits
All brand images: Darius Bashar

 

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