Meet Kim Kendall-De Silva | Marriage Mentor For Women

We had the good fortune of connecting with Kim Kendall-De Silva and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Kim, we’d love to hear more about how you thought about starting your own business?
There was this one meeting — one of those that stretch on forever and say very little. I remember thinking, I could walk out right now. Drop dead. Not come back tomorrow… and nothing would change.
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The work would continue. The minutes would be typed up. Someone else would pick up the slack. It wouldn’t really matter.
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But at home? I had little ones who would miss me. A family that actually noticed when I was gone. That realization stayed with me — not as some dramatic epiphany, but a quiet, steady truth.
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That’s when I started thinking seriously about building something of my own.
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I didn’t want to spend the best hours of my life in places that didn’t feel purposeful. I wanted to create something I could pour myself into — something flexible, fulfilling, and future-focused. I wanted to earn income and still be the mom who’s present, the wife who’s connected, and the woman actually enjoying her life.
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I’ve always loved starting things — creative projects that lead somewhere meaningful. The backend systems? Not my favorite. But once the framework is in place, I thrive inside that structure.
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So that’s what I’m doing now: building something that works for my life.
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Starting my business wasn’t just about helping others (though that matters deeply to me). It was about creating something sustainable, flexible, and legacy-worthy — a space I could grow into, even beyond retirement, without depending on someone else’s paycheck.
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I didn’t start with a grand plan. I started with a decision: to stop waiting for freedom — and go build it.

Let’s talk shop? Tell us more about your career, what can you share with our community?
You know how some wives feel like their husband isn’t romantic anymore—like he was when they were dating?
And over time she starts to feel taken for granted, the touches fade. The flirty glances disappear. Conversations turn into calendar updates.
It starts to feel like they’re just roommates— managing life side by side… but not really seen.
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Well, I help women like that spark affection, desire, and intimacy again—often by doing something as simple (and powerful) as getting him to plan those fun dates again. The kind that brings back the butterflies. The kind that makes her feel chosen. Like she’s his person—not just his partner.
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What sets me apart is that I don’t mentor from crisis.
My own relationship has been steady and (mostly) joy-filled for over two decades—but I’ve always paid attention.
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I’ve watched strong, brilliant women go from feeling adored to feeling invisible.
It’s not that the love disappeared—it’s that no one taught them how to shift the small, daily patterns that shape the atmosphere of a marriage.
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That’s why I do this work—not to fix women, but to equip them.
Because so many are stuck in this waiting game…
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Waiting for him to be “ready” for therapy.
Waiting for a big fight or breakdown to finally mean something has to change.
Waiting for him to just notice how lonely she feels.
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But we don’t have to wait.
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Change happens in the little things—how we respond when he walks in the room, how we speak up instead of shutting down, how we allow touch, or pull away without even realizing it.
It doesn’t take a massive shift—it takes consistent, quiet, courageous choices.
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Getting here professionally wasn’t easy.
The biggest hurdle wasn’t strategy—it was self-permission.
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I had to stop asking, “Who am I to do this?”
And start saying, “I can’t not do it.”
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Mentors like Eiji and Kris helped me peel off the “good girl” layer and step into grounded, intuitive leadership.
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One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned?
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The difference between can’t and won’t.
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I used to say, “I can’t show up like that,” when what I really meant was… “I’m scared.”
Scared to be visible. Scared to say something real. Scared it wouldn’t land.
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But when I realized I had the capacity—emotionally, spiritually, intellectually—it shifted everything.
Because I could. I just didn’t want to feel uncomfortable.
And when I stopped letting fear decide what I did or didn’t do… I got to work.
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Now, I help women reclaim that same power inside their marriages.
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Because the spark doesn’t have to die.
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What I want the world to know about my brand is this:
You don’t have to wait until your marriage is falling apart to build something better.
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The women I work with aren’t looking for a total relationship overhaul.
They just want to feel… seen again.
Touched with genuine affection. Spoken to with warmth. Desired with depth.
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And what I teach is how to create those changes with small, consistent shifts—like how you say good morning.
How you hold eye contact just two seconds longer.
How you show up with warmth and openness—without needing him to go first.
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I don’t teach abstract “connection” or vague “communication.”
I mentor how to live those things—minute by minute—so your marriage doesn’t just survive…
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It lights you up again.

Let’s say your best friend was visiting the area and you wanted to show them the best time ever. Where would you take them? Give us a little itinerary – say it was a week long trip, where would you eat, drink, visit, hang out, etc.
This July, I’ll be spending a few days in Santa Clarita with my husband and kids, and we’re planning a mix of fun, rest, and excitement. Maybe we’ll hike through Placerita Canyon, and check out Castaic Lake. My boys want to spend a full day getting their adrenaline fix at Six Flags Magic Mountain.
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A visit to The Gentle Barn is on our list, and of course, one date night planned—with dinner at Piccola Trattoria and maybe a show at The MAIN in Old Town Newhall.
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We’re also hoping to catch the SENSES Block Party if the timing works out—live music, food trucks, and a bit of local flavor.

Who else deserves some credit and recognition?
As a marriage mentor for women, it would almost be remiss of me not to start with my husband, Silvero De Silva. But more importantly than that—he’s just been totally awesome. He’s supported me in ways I never expected, and didn’t even know I needed. He’s shown up for me with encouragement, perspective, and belief. It’s been an incredible gift.
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I’ve also had the privilege of learning from some incredible mentors. Casey Lightbody in Australia helped me reconnect with my voice early on. I was part of Eiji Morishita’s Movement Makers community, and for the last few years, I’ve been working one-on-one with my mentor Kristoffer Thompson, based right here in San Diego. He’s helped me not just with business and sales, but also with growing into my role as a marriage mentor.
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And if I had to name one book that shifted my perspective on how I show up (and how I want to show up—it’s always a work in progress) it would be The Courage to Be Disliked by Ichiro Kishimi. That book really got under my skin in the best way.

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